Dumb-o-mat

Susan’s generous Uncle Barry gave us the money to buy a washer and dryer when we got married. Before we got those appliances, I would do the laundromat thing. 

I really didn’t mind it. It gave me time to think, although not hard enough, it turns out.

Here's what a laundromat dryer looks like

Our washer and dryer, the same ones we got when we were married, are currently indisposed. It had been a while since I’d been back to the local laundromat and apparently, since then, I’ve forgotten everything I had learned.

I emptied a dark load into one washing machine and a white load into another. I had brought loonies, twoonies and detergent. 

All good. I got this.

Both machines were whirring away!

Several minutes later, the first washing machine stopped, so I opened up the dryer beside it, confidently loaded in the wet clothes, selected “hot”, put change in the slots, and pressed “start”.

All good. Right on!

The second washing machine stopped, so I did the same thing and sat back. Snap! Look at Joe Cool (aka Joe Laundromat), with my headphones on my ears, listening to music.

All good. Then bad.

Why in tarnation was water splashing around in the window of the dryer?

Stunned and puzzled, I jumped to my feet and rushed over to the machines.

The machines I thought were dryers turned out to be slightly larger washing machines.

I was washing our washed laundry a second time! Uh, minus detergent.

After gritting my teeth, stomping my feet and pulling my hair (internally), I calmly walked over to where the attendant was folding clothes, confessed my mistake and asked if I could stop the machines. She told me, with a face as smirkless as she could muster, the machines lock until the wash is complete. She also explained turning off the electricity would stop all the other machines in the laundromat. No can do.

FYI - these are all washing machines

Resigned, I searched out extremely calming tunes on my ipod, and waited.

I went back to the attendant to ask for more change, because by then, my coin baggie was dry.

For reference, machines that are bigger than washing machines aren’t necessarily dryers. The machines I thought were for dry cleaning, because way back when, larger machines at the laundromat were for dry cleaning, may well be dryers.

In case you find yourself in a laundromat, I hope that helps.

Here I thought I was being brilliantly efficient. At one time, I remember being brilliantly efficient in the laundromat! The convenience of household appliances has clearly knocked me off my game.

I told my wife what I'd done, which is nearly always a mistake! She told two people, who told two people…

For those of you who haven't heard yet, I thought I'd beat her to the punch.

Live and learn.

Doubt me if you must, but up until a few days ago, my laundromat proficiency record had been spotless.