Thursday, October 7, 2010

Beanie Baby Mentality

Frig!
I just hung up the phone with BBM.
If it exists, I should probably subscribe to the universal values and virtues newsletter.
I certainly hope there hasn't been an update and honesty still is the best policy.
I took the dogs for a walk this morning and when I got back, I decided to check the answering machine.
There are times when, inadvertently, Susan and Tristan forget to tell me I was left a message on the machine.
I've discovered my random spot checks of the answering machine can sometimes reveal gold.
I decided to listen to the last message that came in and, as it turns out, it was someone from the Bureau of Broadcast Measurement calling to do a phone survey on our television viewing habits.
They left a call-back number.
I called back and was told they would contact us tonight. They asked me what the best time to call would be, to which I replied, after five o'clock, because, by then, Susan is home.
I get home later.
I was just sitting at the computer tonight, when the phone rang.
Glancing at the call display, I saw the letters "BBM".
I answered and the woman explained the survey would take six minutes.
I told her, as agreeably as I could, I would be happy to do the survey.
The doomed and brief exchange went something like this:
Question 1, "What were you doing when the phone rang?"
Answer 1, "Working on the computer."
Question 2, "Are you over 18 and a member of the household?"
Answer 2, "Yes."
Question 3, "Do you, or does anyone in your household, work in the media, for a television station, or for a radio station?"
I paused, trapped.
Answer 3, delivered with detectable reluctance, "Yes, I work in the media."
Declaration 4, "Then you are not eligible to participate in this poll. I apologize for wasting your time."
Click.
I could feel the scratching of precious ratings, slipping like grains of sand, through my fingers .
I could have royally, heftily and gleefully skewed those television viewing results in favor of the television station where I'm working.
Has there been an update, are nice guys still finishing last?
Frig!
Of course, the question I was most itching to answer, was, "Who is your favorite news anchor?"
Tee hee.

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