Thursday, January 19, 2017

Kitchen Bumpkin

I’ve admitted here before, the grocery store is like a second home to me! The fact likely points to some serious organizational failings, along with possible compulsion issues and undue budget strains, but I’m good with it.

I’m there every day, so when there are promotional stamps, or gas discounts to collect, my Air Miles card is perpetually poised for a swipe.

We redeemed grocery store stamps for a frying pan last year (See “Teeny Stamp Nonsense” January 6, 2016). At least now, the stamps are digital, and not actual flimsy physical stamps you have to stick on a card!

Last night, Susan and I redeemed the latest stamps I’ve been collecting for three Zwilling J.A. Henckels knives.

We redeemed stamps, but still had to cough up cash for these knives, which I take it, are special.

Susan chose the 4 inch paring knife, the 6 inch slicing knife, and the 8 inch Chef’s knife.

I’m not sure I have the necessary permits to drive these things, but whatever.

On the website of the German company, there are knives for carving, slicing, paring, skinning and peeling, as well as special purpose knives for tomatos, vegetables, bagels, boning, bread, sandwiches, steak and sausages.

Who knew?

There are also Honesuki, Gyutoh, Kudamono, Santoku, Shotoh and Sujihiki knives available on the website.

I still know nothing about knives, but what I just wrote is already more than I’ve ever known, need to know, or care to know.

Dismiss me as a kitchen bumpkin, I can handle it.

There is an 8 inch bread knife on the website, regularly $575.00, available for $459.99 right now. Don’t just sit there, add to cart!

A couple of days ago, a grocery store cashier remarked on the number of stamps I’d collected. The telltale total appears on the bill. She helpfully pointed out the deadline for the stamps-for-knives swap was January 25th.


I was sure the deadline was sometime in February, hence the decision to redeem our stamps last night, before they, possibly, run out of stock.

Our newly-acquired knives, according to what’s printed on the blades, are ice hardened. How high-brow! The internet explains that’s the Henckels term for cryogenic tempering, which involves immersing finished knife blades in liquid nitrogen. Apparently, it’s common in the knife business and maximizes the hardness of stainless steel.

As we surveyed the choice of knives in the grocery store last night, Susan pointed out that with two more stamps, we could get the sharpener.

I’d better get back to the grocery store today to get those two missing stamps!

I guess that’s the point.

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